Forgiving myself and to move on....

Forgiving Yourself - A Belief System

Forgiving yourself is essential. There is a tendency in all of us to hold ourselves more accountable than we do others. Perhaps you have been one who can justify forgiving others, even for a heinous offense, yet you find no justification for forgiving yourself for an equal or lesser offense. Perhaps you believe that forgiving yourself is not even a consideration because you think you must hold yourself in a state of constant remembrance, lest you forget. Perhaps you believe there is a price, some form of life-long penance that you must pay.

Forgiving Yourself - The Divine Example

Forgiving yourself is not specifically addressed in the Bible, but there are principles regarding forgiveness that should be applied. For example, when God forgives us, it states that He remembers our sins no more (Jeremiah 31:34). This does not mean that our all-knowing Father God forgets, but rather, because He forgives us, He chooses not to bring up our sin in a negative way. Peter said, "In truth I perceive that God shows no partiality" (Acts 10:34). Applying "no partiality" to the issues of forgiveness, God does not choose to forgive one person and not another. He forgives everyone who believes in Jesus Christ. Applying His "no partiality" standards to ourselves, it is just as important to forgive ourselves as it is to forgive others.

Forgiving yourself is not about forgetting. It is about not bringing the offense up to yourself in negative ways. Forgiving yourself is simply letting go of what you are holding against yourself so that you can move on with God. If God has moved on, shouldn't we do the same? Philippians 4:9 states that we are to put into practice those things that we have learned from God and from His Word. To continue to rehearse in our thoughts the events of our transgression, opposes Philippians 4:8 which tells us to dwell on whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, and admirable.

Forgiving Yourself - Personal Action

Proverbs 16:25 says, "There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death." The energy it takes to harbor anger, hatred, and resentment towards yourself is exhaustive. Every bit of energy we give to negative activities and dwelling on regrets, robs us of the energy we need to become the person God wants us to be.

Life is full of choices and every choice we make will either take us in a positive, life-giving direction or rob us of the opportunity to be a life-giving individual. Forgiving ourselves does not let us off the hook, it does not justify what we have done, and it is not a sign of weakness. Forgiveness is a choice that takes courage and strength, and it gives us the opportunity to become an overcomer rather than remaining a victim of our own scorn.

If you do not forgive yourself of past sins, it is a form of pride. Whenever we enact a different set of rules, a higher set of standards for ourself over others, that is pride. When we can find it within ourself to forgive others, but not ourselves, we are saying that we are less capable of making a poor decision than others. We are somehow more intuitive, wiser, more insightful, more careful than others, and therefore, we are without excuse and should not forgive ourselves. When we reject the forgiveness extended to us by God and others, when we refuse to forgive ourselves, what we are doing is setting ourselves above others and that is pride! Proverbs 16:18 says, "Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall." Unforgiveness of oneself will bring self-destruction, a haughty spirit, and a fall. Christian forgiveness will bring peace.

Forgiving Yourself - Helping Others and Yourself

Forgiving yourself is also important for those in your sphere of influence. It is a well-known fact that hurting people hurt others. The longer you avoid forgiving yourself, the longer you allow yourself to harbor the feelings that you deserve to suffer for what you did, the more explosive you will become and, therefore, the more apt you are to hurt others.

The reality is that you cannot change what has happened. You cannot restore lives to where they were before the event. However, you can make a difference in the lives of others. You can give back some of what you have taken away by finding a different place to invest your time and compassion. Forgive yourself and let the healing begin!

@http://www.allaboutgod.com/forgiving-yourself.htm

I have been crying so long, long enough because of what i have done in the past ( few years ago, few months ago, few weeks ago, few days ago and even for the things that happened few minutes ago ). I always end up regretting my decision because sometimes it does not only hurts me, but also hurts someone that i really love and also God. I always says like this : "if i didn't do this, maybe things wouldn't go this way.". Sometimes even when other people forgives me, i still cannot forgive myself for what i had done.

One day, i woke up and realizes that my life was breaking apart, and so i called out Him in pain... after gone through a prayer for healing in my life, i opened my laptop and come across this article. I realized that it was because i kept holding onto the past that i was unable to move on. There will be no healing in my life if i was unable to let go the past and to forgive myself. Jesus had died on the cross to forgive my sins. If He was able to forgive me, then why shouldn't I?

From now on, i will start forgive myself, let go the past, and move on with God's love and grace. Maybe i cannot change my past, but i believed God wants to work out the future with me together.

Wherever u are, when u read this, i want to tell u that is not too late to receive God grace and to walk in His will. Every seconds in our life was like a chance to repent and come back to Him. I'm sure like me, He was patiently waiting for u. Remember this, He loves u more than He loves His life. If His love towards us that great, shouldn't it enough to assure us that He will forgives us if we ask Him? Don't forget that He loved us first, despite of our sinful nature and the way we used to be. Jesus knows all about us, but still He is willing to give up His throne and come to the world only to die for us.

John 15. 13 : "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends."

Jesus love us. He died for you. His death is not for you to keep on carrying the shame and guilt for the past, but He wants you to receive God's grace through Jesus blood so that you will be able to move on and live according to His will. Keep on feeling guilt, unable to forgive urself will not change anything. But if u let go ur past, surrender ur life and let God leads u through ur life, I'm sure ur future will change.

Jeremiah 29.11-14a: ""For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back from captivity."

The only way to receive God's promises in our life was by responding His call in our life. U can do this starts from a prayer.

"Dear Heavenly Father, I understand that there is nothing to gain by holding myself in unforgiveness and there is everything to gain by releasing myself from unforgiveness and beginning the process of healing. I want to move forward and make a positive difference in the future. I confess the ungodly accountability, self-abasement, and the vows I have made to never forgive myself. Because Jesus died for my sins, I choose to forgive myself--to no longer punish myself and be angry with myself. I forgive myself for letting this hurt control me and for hurting others out of my hurt. I repent of this behavior and my attitude. I ask for Your forgiveness and healing. God, help me to NEVER again retain unforgiveness of myself or others. Thank you for loving me and for Your grace to move forward with You. In Jesus' Name, Amen."

This was one of the example of prayer i found in the same site, but no matter what words u are using, the most importance was ur heart.

You need to hear yourself forgive yourself! There is great power in the spoken word!

I hope my sharing will help u. God bless. =)